Examples of what I work with

Who I work with

I work with anyone over the age of 18, regardless of gender, sexuality or age. I will work in a way that is congruent, empathic and fully considering your views and your goals.

We may not be of the same generation, ethnicity or sexual orientation, but I will work from your frame of reference, from how you are feeling and seeing the world. Offering acceptance and support to you as the unique individual you are.

What to expect from the first session

Beginning counselling can be quite daunting so and I understand this can be quite difficult for some.

After contacting me we can have an email exchange so that you can share how you are feeling, any concerns you have and what has led you to seek counselling. I will try to answer any questions you have and give an idea of how I can support you and if you’re happy with this, we would arrange out first session.

This first session is unique in that it will focus more on us, what has led you to seek counselling, your feelings around counselling as well as any previous experiences with counselling. This allows us to set the stage for the work ahead and to give you the opportunity to share with me exactly what you hope to achieve.

I will also use this session to go through confidentiality, my cancellation policy and payment information so that you understand my legal responsibilities and your rights in us working together.

Unexpected Diagnosis

There are many times in life when we receive bad news. News which shakes our understanding of the world and ourselves. Receiving news of an unexpected diagnosis – be this autism, dyslexia, a long-term chronic condition or cancer – can leave us feeling lost and questioning how this could have happened to us or even how could our body betray us like this.

Not only is our sense of self called into question, our understanding of our health, our relationship with our bodies and our idea of what the future might look like are too. It can be a time of fear, anxiety and loss in which we can easily become consumed with worry and lose sight of what we really need at times. Often requiring a balanced approach of feeling these fears and acknowledging your worries, planning accordingly. Alongside practicing self-care and self-love, remembering the good that our bodies provide us and finding the little things in life we can continue to enjoy as we find new routines and patterns that work better with our new conditions.

If you find yourself overwhelmed with what a new diagnosis might mean for you and am unsure how to manage, I can provide a safe space to both explore your fears and worries while also finding ways to manage and make the most of your situation.

Miscarriage and Infant Loss

The loss of a child, whether born or unborn, is certainly one of the most trying times we can have in life. Something that is often worse due to society’s way of avoiding the topic of death or making statements to try to reduce the pain.

What many do not see is the pain of losing what could have been, the names, the little person they could have grown into, the unmatchable excitement and hope for the future that have suddenly been dashed and replaced with sadness, fear and worry. I recognise how difficult this time can be, how hard it can feel to talk to others about what could have been and the isolation that can come from being avoided by others who do not wish to have the “uncomfortable” conversation.

I also know how difficult it can be for the partner during these times where you may feel unable to grieve fully for wanting to support your partner, often finding yourself beset by grief much later, almost out of nowhere.

I have training from Infant Loss UK to be better able to provide a safe space in which you can freely talk about the loss you have suffered, process your grief at a pace that is appropriate for you and address any anxiety or fear you may have around future pregnancies or the idea of.

Online counselling

Working online can be equally as effective as face-to-face sessions, while also being more flexible and convenient.

If you’re interested in working online, you will need to have a few things. A good Wi-Fi connection, a phone, computer or tablet in which to have the session, an email address, a safe and private space to attend the sessions and ideally a camera. We show a lot in our body language, being able to see one another really benefits the counselling process. Though this isn't strictly needed.

The software I use for sessions is secure and HIPAA compliant so you can feel assured your data is protected. Also you will not be required to download anything I will simply email over a link for you to use.

If you're interested in working together remotely just let me know and we can discuss it in more detail.

Good Change Feeling Bad?

When bad things happen, we expect to feel worried, annoyed, anxious etc, as something bad has happened. But when good things happen, we expect to feel good or feel that we should be happy as a “happy” thing has happened. However, this isn’t always the case and can be isolating and confusing.

While big changes like marriage or having children or landing a new big job are often considered good changes and big achievements. They are still change. And any change has the potential to call into question our sense of self, to introduce imposter syndrome and to bring up anxieties and old wounds. Furthermore, as these changes are often branded as “good”, we can feel alone, misunderstood or unable to share what is bothering you for fear of others not understanding or thinking we’re being ungrateful. We can feel ashamed or wrong in ourselves for not feeling the way that we “should” be feeling.

But it’s important to know that all change can leave us feeling lost and anxious, and all change can be an opportunity for us to learn, grow, and to reconnect with ourselves as we learn to align with the new reality we’re living in. By talking openly about how you’re feeling, and what is happening in your life you can come to understand what is causing your distress, gain a better sense of who you are and the choice to accept yourself and your circumstances.

Leaving School-University

Leaving school/graduating university are huge events, they are a time of great change symbolising the transition from full time education to adulthood and independence. For many they are a time of celebration, for many they can also be a time of great anxiety.

A shift from the structured routine, purpose and continued progress of education to what can feel like an endless void of possibility, in which we need to find our own way, our own careers and our own meaning to life with little to no guidance. It’s a time where our sense of self is called into question – often before we’ve lived enough to even have a defined sense of self - and we’re forced to confront the realities of society head on. And it often brings up old societal expectations, ideas such as I should be independent now, I should know what I want to do with my life, I should be moving towards marriage, having kids, buying a house etc.

But this does not need to be a time of isolation, as such worries are incredibly common, nor does it need to be a time of confusing and anxiety. This can be an opportunity to reflect on who you are and want to be, what possibilities are out there for you to explore and what aligns with your goals and values. A time to build a stronger sense of self and to learn how to manage anxiety while also challenging societal ideas and pressures in favour for what you wish to do and what matters to you.